ASSISTANTS FOR THE DAY
Best Man - The groom will choose his best man who has a large part to play in the
wedding. It is obviously not always possible to have a responsible and sensible best man.
However as long he can organise he should do fine.
Best Man - Responsibilities
1. Arranging the Stag Night - this is probably one
of the most enjoyable responsibilities for the best man.
Basic Rule: Don’t let on to the bride the real plan of action for the evening. It
might result in a stag night without the stag. I know of someone whose bride and pending
mother in law discovered that plans had been made for a rather dodgy stripper and he
wasn’t allowed out that night! It sounds unlikely but sometimes bad feelings can
override mature behaviour. In his case he felt that it just wasn’t worth the
potential ongoing complaints for the sake of a night out.
2. To ensure the groom gets to the church in
good time.
Best to make sure that the groom does not really have a hangover. It might sound
macho but all it really means is that the groom has poisoned his bloodstream for the day.
Why suffer pain just for someone else to have a laugh? If the groom wants to make his
bride happy on her special day he needs to share all of the special moments with her.
3. To take care of wedding rings until they are
needed.
4. To organise the ushers on the day
| .The Speech -
this is the part of the reception that the groom, bride and anyone else at the reception
who knows the best man dreads. We have all seen the film clip from Four Weddings and a
Funeral. Ex-girlfriends are definitely off the agenda. However now that the bride and
groom are married, mother-in-law comments are perfectly acceptable providing they are in
good taste and are actually funny. Advice to the best man: Just remember what you have
previously told the bride about the stag night. You don’t want to drop any little
bombshells on the wedding day. Don’t upset anyone - it should be remembered as a
happy day! In fact keep away from the smutty stuff altogether unless it is the norm for
your particular families. |
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It is always desirable to start a speech with a little quip to get a
little laugh and get the audience on your side. The trouble is that if it isn’t funny
it will have the opposite effect so give some thought to your opening words for some time
before you make the speech.
In fact, when anyone stands up to make a social speech the audience is always on their
side at the beginning. They want it to be a pleasant and amusing experience and they want
you to come across well. They do not want to be embarrassed by tasteless remarks and they want
you to have made a mature friendly impression when you sit down.
Traditionally the best man talks about the groom. How he first got to know him, what
his interests are, what a good friend he is, his successes in sport, work,
socially etc.
Why he will make such a good husband for the bride and all that sort of thing. There is
always mention of amusing or even embarrassing incidents but keep it so that the bride is
proud of him and so are her parents who are losing a treasured possession to him and want
to make sure she will always be well cared for.
You can talk about how you were first introduced to the bride, fun times, holidays etc.
and finally when you end your speech you toast the happy couple.
Your exact closing words will be something like: "Ladies and gentlemen may I ask
you to stand and toast Jennifer and John - then give them a minute to stand up and stop
shuffling around.
"May they enjoy a long and happy married life together. Ladies and gentlemen, the
bride and groom, Jennifer and John."
Everyone else will repeat the toast and you can sit down knowing you have made a good
impression. If the bride’s mother is in tears you will have done well.
Ushers
| Ushers are required at a wedding to assist the best man to
ensure the day goes smoothly. The ushers should show guests to their seats, hand out
service sheets and ensure that after the service, guests know how to get to the reception
and that everyone has transport. Most weddings have between two and four ushers. Chief Bridesmaid
The Chief Bridesmaid should assist the smaller attendants, if there are any, and the
bride, to get dressed. Hold on to the bride’s bouquet during the service and try to
control the smaller attendants. Assist the bride in changing into her going-away outfit. |
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| You might like to
visit our custom & tradition section |
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